The Power Of Letting Go

Forgiveness helps us emerge whole from our wounded past, and return to the business of our lives with renewed energy, wisdom and peace. It is the bottleneck through which we must pass to reclaim our happiness and health, says Suma Varughese.

-  Suma Varughese.

Let us go on a journey, you and I. The journey begins with a universal reality – a hurt. Someone or something has hurt us. It may be a small hurt or it may be an unbearably grievous one. No matter. The process is the same. We humans are born with tender, fragile psyches and in the course of living, our psyches invariably ends up with cuts, bruises, gashes and other injuries. In the battle of life, we are all wounded soldiers, bleeding internally and often silently. “As a therapist, I believe that most people’s issues can be traced to hurts – starting with parents, siblings, extended families, teachers, friends, colleagues in workplaces, bosses and supervisors, spouses and children. In a culture where so much religious teaching focuses on forgiveness, there is no practical training in forgiving people and moving on,” observed Anita Anand, a Delhi-based hypnotherapist.

“Two and a half years ago, I put others’ needs ahead of mine, because I wanted their approval and love. I was out of touch with my own needs. However, a relative said something that hurt me tremendously and I snapped. Almost involuntarily, I cut off all relations with my family, and went through two years of extreme isolation and loneliness. I did not think I could forgive them in this lifetime,” says Ajay Kalra, a Mumbai-based trainer and life coach.

“My hurt and trauma at being subjected to unacceptable behaviour during childhood weighed me down so much, I was unable to lead my life,” says Jasmine Bharathan, an energy psychologist working with the healing modalities of EFT and TAT.

What happens when we carry this accumulated baggage of hurt in our life?