It’s official: we’re in a new age of apologising. Remorse on a grand media scale (think Kanye vs TSwift) is required to be effusive, and in everyday life there seem to be more beg pardons thrown about than ever: sorry that you bumped into me getting on the bus, sorry I’m asking you to fulfill your job description. Intertwined with the thinking that everyone is ready to take offence at pretty much everything (hello, Twitter), people in the public sphere are pre-emptively apologising. And yet, when you really have screwed up and a sorry is needed to regain equilibrium, it’s still often the hardest word to say. Huh? We’re sorry, but we don’t quite understand.
A Sorry State
Science has shown not only that apologies might play a vital role in helping us get along with others, but that the reason is rooted in brain chemistry. According to a study in the journal PLOS ONE, receiving an apology activates the regions responsible for empathy, leading to an uptick in the so-called love hormone oxytocin. Someone apologises to you, this hormone floods your system and you almost immediately feel less stressed, less aggressive and more open.
And as for the apologiser? “Saying sorry can have a powerful effect on your sense of self and allows you to restore a good self-image,” says Dr Karina Schumann, assistant professor of psychology at the University of Pittsburgh.
This story is from the April 2020 edition of Women's Health Australia.
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This story is from the April 2020 edition of Women's Health Australia.
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