PENTAGON UFO SKEPTIC KICKED INTO STRATOSPHERE!

Honcho packs bags after turning blind eye to evidence of aliens

PENTAGON UFO chief Sean Kirkpatrick is leaving his position after vehemently insisting aliens aren’t real despite a damning avalanche of proof, say critics, in a shocking shakeup at the All-Domain Anomaly Resolution Office (AARO) — the Department of Defense silo tasked with tracking the ominous crafts buzzing our nation’s skies!

Sources snitch the embattled physicist’s departure from AARO — which is slated for year’s end — follows months of controversy that left the division with egg on its face!

Pundits have charged the former CIA officer dutifully perpetuated the government’s decades-long whitewash of UFOs and concealed data suggesting otherworldly ETs routinely visit our planet!

Lisa Fine — author of an online petition calling for Kirkpatrick’s removal, which garnered almost 2,000 signatures — fumes the federal official “repeatedly lied to the American people about a lack of evidence concerning UFOs!”