Insomnia is my Mastermind subject

WHY HADLEY FREEMAN NEEDS TO STARE AT THE WALLPAPER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT

- HADLEY FREEMAN

As a bad sleeper, I am often told that I need to make my bedroom more peaceful. ‘A calming nest’ is a phrase I often hear, with plain walls, no pattern, no distractions, no excitement. Just soothing blankness.

This is nonsense. I may not be able to speak on much with authority, but sleep difficulties are my Mastermind subject and, as such, I can tell you that the one thing a troubled sleeper does not need is a blank wall.

When you find yourself tossing and turning at 2am and sleep feels like a foreign language you were never taught at school, the problem is not that your walls are too patterned, it’s that your mind is dancing around like a chimpanzee on speed.