IN 2007, New York Magazine launched its "Sex Diaries" column, turning readers into a mass of eager voyeurs getting their jollies by peering into random New Yorkers' bedrooms (or bathrooms, or kitchens, or public restrooms of choice) each week. Over the years, the column has done more than just entertain; it's become an exhaustive, longitudinal catalogue of the ways people fuck in this city-a compilation of primary-source documents deserving of a place in the National Archives, in my opinion.
On December 16, "Sex Diaries" became an HBO docuseries. In anticipation of its TV debut, I took a spin through the archives to see how sex has changed from the days when "Aqueous Transmission," by Incubus, was considered a suitable fuck track and BlackBerrys-with their filthy little rollerballs-outnumbered iPhones.
I read through nights with thirsty finance bros, afternoons with stay-at-home moms having revenge-fuck fantasies, and hours with persevering singles determined to get to the end of a date. I was sometimes turned on, sometimes existentially freaked out, sometimes proud of the way New Yorkers get it on, sometimes sad for humanity, sometimes so sick of reading endless details of masturbation habits that I wept blood tears. Trends emerged, linguistic patterns evolved, demographics shifted. And, sure, the Diarists are a self-selecting group of really-eager-to-share exhibitionists and wannabe Carrie Bradshaws with a surplus of therapeutic vocabulary and a kink for emotional drama, but as I read about all the different kinds of good sex, bad sex, thwarted attempts at sex, sex catastrophes, and occasional occurrences of sex that made people see God, a story about how New Yorkers have gotten down over the years began to emerge, one that revealed what has made good sex (at least good "Sex Diaries" sex) good.
Dirty Talk "Me No Likey" Early-Aughts (But Surprisingly, It Made Sex Fun?)
This story is from the December 19, 2022 - January 01, 2023 edition of New York magazine.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Sign In
This story is from the December 19, 2022 - January 01, 2023 edition of New York magazine.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Sign In
LIFE AS A MILLENNIAL STAGE MOM
A journey into the CUTTHROAT and ADORABLE world of professional CHILD ACTORS.
THE NEXT DRUG EPIDEMIC IS BLUE RASPBERRY FLAVORED
When the Amor brothers started selling tanks of flavored nitrous oxide at their chain of head shops, they didn't realize their brand would become synonymous with the country's burgeoning addiction to gas.
Two Texans in Williamsburg
David Nuss and Sarah Martin-Nuss tried to decorate their house on their own— until they realized they needed help: Like, how do we not just go to Pottery Barn?”
ADRIEN BRODY FOUND THE PART
The Brutalist is the best, most personal work he's done since The Pianist.
Art, Basil
Manuela is a farm-to-table gallery for hungry collectors.
'Sometimes a Single Word Is Enough to Open a Door'
How George C. Wolfein collaboration with Audra McDonald-subtly, indelibly reimagined musical theater's most domineering stage mother.
Rolling the Dice on Bird Flu
Denial, resilience, déjà vu.
The Most Dangerous Game
Fifty years on, Dungeons & Dragons has only grown more popular. But it continues to be misunderstood.
88 MINUTES WITH...Andy Kim
The new senator from New Jersey has vowed to shake up the political Establishment, a difficult task in Trump's Washington.
Apex Stomps In
The $44.6 million mega-Stegosaurus goes on view (for a while) at the American Museum of Natural History.
